I hardly ever take photos at events because I'm quite terrible. but I made a section anyway.

If you want to hire me for your wedding, please contact me. I only charge $500 per second, plus all traveling expenses to any location of my choosing, which may or may not be to your wedding. However, I do require any leftover cake to be shipped to my home. I will be there if you have a buffet. But I rarely carry my camera. If I don’t have my camera, then I only charge $500 per hour.